World 3, MLS 0

It was a bad night for Major League Soccer clubs involved in international matches, as Chicago lost in the SuperLiga Cup final and New York was booted from the CONCACAF Champions League. Then, there was the exhibition in Seattle.

In the third annual SuperLiga, Mexican club Tigres defeated MLS's Chicago Fire 4-3 on penalty kicks after the Cup final finished 1-1 AET.

New York, meanwhile, lost the away leg of their home-and-home with T&T side W Connection 2-1 and were bounced 4-3 on aggregate from the CCL.

Finally, European champs Barcelona filleted the Sounders 4-0 due to the "strange alchemy" of Lionel Messi.

Sound the bell, they're off

MLS's newest franchise smoked MLS's most disappointing franchise, as the Seattle Sounders defeated the New York Red Bulls by a score of 2-0 in the opening game of the MLS season. It a pretty ugly game, the Sounders pace showed that New York still have not addressed their defensive issues from a year ago. Goals by Colombian new boy Fredy Montero and former Crew striker Brad Evans gave Seattle their first win in their first game. But before Drew Carey starts dreaming too big, they should consider just how poor of a performance New York turned in. Here are the highlights:

MLS Cup: Crew win, complete double

The Columbus Crew defeated the New York Red Bulls 3-1 in the 2008 MLS Cup at the Home Depot Center on Sunday, completing the MLS double (Supporters Shield and MLS Cup) and winning their first-ever Cup.

In a match that had TYH wishing he had put money on the match, Columbus played midnight to New York's Cinderella story, getting goals from Alejandro Moreno, Chad Marshall and Frankie Hejduk -- all assisted by MLS Cup MVP Guillermo Barros Schelotto.

Moreno opened the scoring in the 31st minute, taking a GBS thru pass and scoring with a low diagonal shot inside the far post. But Red Bull fans held out hope after their side equalized in the 51st minute, as John Wolyniec scored his second of the playoffs off a Dane Richards pass. But the hope was shortlived -- two minutes to be exact -- as the Crew regained the lead in the 53rd minute, with yet another Chad Marshall header off a GBS corner. With New York pressing in attack, GBS had one more bit of magic, chipping over the New York backline to Heydude, who headed over the onrushing Danny Cepero (Johnny swept the leg), and that's all she wrote.

Pretty


Prettier


Prettiest

MLS Look-a-likes (Cup edition)

NY GOALKEEPER DANNY CEPERO

AND

KARATE KID RALPH MACCHIO

MLS Cup: #8 tackles #1 in Cup final

New York Red Bulls vs. Columbus Crew

MLS Cup 2008 (@ the HDC)

Sunday, November 23

3:30pmET on ABC, TeleFutura

After sneaking into the Cup playoffs through the backdoor, left open by DC United on the final regular season matchday, it looked like the New York Red Bulls would have yet another brief appearance in the postseason. But they managed the impossible and knocked out the defending Cup champion Houston Dynamo with a 3-0 thrashing. Then, with Alexi Lalas promising to shotgun a large can of Red Bull if New York upset Real Salt Lake, the soccer gods saw fit to turn a myriad of Salt Lake shots toward the woodwork and New York told Lalas, "Bottoms up, buttercup!" with a 1-0 win. 

Now they're in the final, but in order to put a cherry on top of this improbable Cup sundae, they must beat the Supporters Shield Champion Columbus Crew, the #1 seed in the MLS Cup playoff and a club that scored 11 more goals than New York had points during the regular season. It's not only improbable; it would be the biggest upset in MLS history.

Can Cinderella pull it off? Or will the Crew play matador to these winged Red Bulls?

TYH's Prediction: NY 1-3 CLB

MLS Cup: Fill the Cup with Red Bull

New York 1-0 Real Salt Lake (Rio Tinto Stadium)
Cinderella still has wings, as the Red Bulls stun Real Salt Lake 1-0 in a match that saw the home side hit the post several times. Now thanks to the silly format of the MLS Cup, the east coast club has won the Western Conference crown, but more importantly, New York will be making their first appearance in the MLS Cup, where they will face Columbus. Dave van den Bergh was the hero for the Red Bulls, cleaning up a rebound in the 28th minute (truly a garbage goal). RSL had the bulk of the possession and the best of the chances from that point on, but it appears that the soccer gods are Mormons, as RSL went begging on chance after chance. Overall, it was a pretty dreadful match, especially when compared to Thursday's instant classic between Chicago and Columbus. But by far the best thing about this match is that now Alexi Lalas will have to make good on his promise to shotgun a can of Red Bull. I hope he gets sick.

MLS Cup: Conf. championships set

Eastern Conference Championship
Thursday, November 13
Chicago Fire @ Columbus Crew (7:30pmET  on ESPN2)
It's Blanco versus Schelotto. This is the real MLS Cup. It's too bad that it has to take place in the Eastern Conference championship. Both clubs rolled over their semi-final opponents, but Columbus will enjoy home field advantage. The Fire are just 6-5-4 on the road this season, whereas the Crew are 11-2-2 in the comfy confines of Crew stadium. The Crew and Fire drew both times they faced each other in the regular season, so this match has the makings of an instant classic.

Prediction: Chicago 2-3 Columbus

Western Conference Championship
Sunday, November 16
New York Red Bulls @ Real Salt Lake (TBA)

Who gets to claim underdog status in this one? The team who have been colossal underachievers since they joined the league in 2005 or the perennial choke artists New York, who barely made it into the playoffs before beating the defending Cup champs. Midfield play will figure greatly in this one and unfortunately for New York, RSL have Javier Morales who definitely should be in the conversation for MLS Cup MVP. Can Angel and company pull off another shocker?

Prediction: New York 2-3 Salt Lake (AET)

MLS Cup 2008 - (@ the HDC)

Sunday, November 23
3:30pmET on ABC, TeleFutura

MLS Cup: NY West stun Dynos

New York 3-0 Houston (Robertson Stadium)
After narrowly making the playoffs, thanks to a DC loss on the last day of the regular season, the Red Bulls managed one of the biggest upsets in MLS Cup history by knocking out the defending Cup champions 4-1 on aggregate, after trouncing the Dynamo in their home stadium 3-0. With the aggregate locked at 1-1 after the first leg, Dane Richards scored in the 25th minute to get things going for New York. Then, Juan Pablo Angel converted a PK 11 minutes later and the Red Bulls were well on their way. John Wolyniec sprinkled a little salt in the champs wound in the 81st minute with New York's third unanswered goal. Despite being an Eastern Conference club, New York will advance to face Real Salt Lake in the Western Conference by virtue of MLS's crazy playoff structure that awards the final four spots in the playoffs by record and not by place in the conference.

MLS Cup: Favorites save late draws

Chivas USA 0-1 Salt Lake (Rio Tinto Stadium)
After saving RSL from elimination, Yura Movsisyan kept RSL moving in a positive direction, scoring the only goal, a cheeky back-heel, in the opener of Salt Lake's Western Conference semifinal with Chivas USA. His 90th minute goal gives Real the advantage going into the second-leg in Los Angeles next week.

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Houston 1-1 New York (Giants Stadium)
After backing into the playoffs courtesy of a DC United loss, New York managed to lead the home leg of their series with Houston for almost 40 minutes, as Juan Pablo Angel put the Red Bulls up 1-0 in the 48th minute before the Dynamo's Kei Kamara in the 85th minute. By virtue of finishing of finishing fifth in the Easy, New York shifted over to become the fourth seed in the Western Conference semifinals.

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Columbus 1-1 Kansas City (CAB)
Davy Arnaud's 53rd minute strike looked like it would be the game-winner against Eastern COnference top-seed Columbus, when Steven Lenhart scored a crucial equalizer two minutes into injury time. Columbus will now host Kansas City at Crew Stadium, even on goals (there is no road-goal advantage in the MLS Cup).

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MLS Thursday: NY Rolfed up (Week 31)

New York 2-5 Chicago (Toyota Park)
With their playoff chances on the line, a win and your in scenario, the Red Bulls did what it does best ... they choked -- hard. Chris Rolfe rolfed all over the NY defense, scoring a FIRST-HALF hattrick, en route to a rout. Juan Pablo Angel equalized after the initial Rolfe score, but after two-more by the diminutive University of Dayton product and then two more Fire goals by Brian McBride and Daniel Woolard on the other side of halftime, the Red Bulls were looking like pink ponies. Macoumba Kandji scored a meaningless goal for NY in the 88th. Now, New York must pray that both DC and Colorado lose their matches, so they can back in to the MLS Cup playoffs. New York's loss also puts KC in to the playoffs regardless of this weekend's results.

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The MLS Cup playoff picture

What if I show them my man boobs?

With one match to play, five teams are vying for the final three spots in the MLS Cup playoffs. Taking into consideration tie-breaks (head-to-head, then goal differential), these are the current standings:

TEAM	GP	W	L	D	Pts.	Diff
Kansas City	29	10	10	9	39	-4
New York	29	10	10	9	39	-3
Salt Lake	29	10	10	9	39	1
Colorado	29	11	14	4	37	-1
DC United	29	11	14	4	37	-7

As you can see, Kansas City, New York and Real Salt Lake are all in the driver's seat. The match to watch next week will be Real Salt Lake versus Colorado, with the winner most likely punching their ticket to the MLS Cup playoffs. The other four clubs will face teams that have already qualified or have been eliminated. DC face Columbus on Sunday, who will likely rest their starters, but even if the Red-and-Black manage a win, they could be eliminated if Colorado beat Real Salt Lake. This is because Colorado boast a much better goal differential, meaning DC would have to win by something like eight goals (depending on the score of Colorado v Salt Lake) to move ahead on the tie-break.

Is all that too confusing? 

MLS Saturday: Penultimate (Week 30)

Saturday
Chicago 2-3 Toronto (BMO Field)
A brace by 50-cent fav Rohan Ricketts gave Toronto the 3-2 win. Amado Guevara put TFC up in the 12th minute and Ricketts doubled the lead six minutes later, putting back a PK rebound. Chicago's Justin Mapp pulled one back in the 25th minute, but Ricketts scored again in first-half injury time. Cuauhtemoc Blanco scored a 59th minute conciliation goal for the Fire. It was all for naught, however, as Toronto was eliminated from playoff contention due to results around the league.

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Columbus 1-3 New York (Giants Stadium)
Danny Cepero? Wasn't he Ralph Macchio's character in The Karate Kid? Cepero -- who assumed goalkeeping duties for the Red Bulls after starting keep Jon Conway tested positive for andro this week -- became the first goalkeeper to score in Major League Soccer history with a long ball sent in from his own half. The ball took a big bounce on the artificial turf and went over Crew keeper Andy Gruenebaum's head. But this embarrassing goal was only the icing on a 3-1 win, powered by a Juan Pablo Angel brace, that kept New York in contention for one of the last three MLS Cup playoff spots with a match in hand. Steven Lenhart had the Crew's lone goal.

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San Jose 2-2 Kansas City (CAB)
Despite a valiant effort by the Quakes and a sick save by Joe Cannon in the final two minutes, a 3-2 loss saw the re-expansioners eliminated from the MLS Cup playoffs. The two clubs traded shots, with Claudio Lopez scoring first in the 18th minute and then Scott Sealy answering two minutes later. The Wizards regained the lead in the 27th minute but rookie Shea Salinas scored his first goal of his MLS career, a pin-ball putback, to finish the scoring. Then, Herculez Gomez scored the winner in the final minute of extra time off a corner.

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Los Angeles 0-3 Houston (Robertson Stadium)
Another year, another Beckham-less MLS Cup playoffs...just goes to show that you can't trade the whole farm for one prized cow. With ol' Bessy on the sideline due to yellow card accumulation, the terrible Galaxy defense surrendered three first half goals (own goal-14, Dwayne DeRosario-20 and Nate Jaqua-23) and were eliminated from playoff contention by the Dynamo, who clinched the Western Conference crown.

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FC Dallas 1-3 Salt Lake (RES)
From hero to goat, Marcelo Saragosa scored to put Dallas ahead, but then saw two yellow cards inside of 20 minutes and was shown the door. Five minutes later, Yura Movsisyan equalized for the home team. Then, Will Johnson put RSL ahead on the other side of halftime, and finally Robbie Findlay finished the scoring in the 86th minute. The Hoops lost midfielder Pablo Ricchetti on a straight red in the 90th minute. They also lost out on a playoff spot, thanks to results in other matches. SIlly, Dallas. You should have kept him.

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Proof MLS is major: A steroid scandal!

So it turns out that wings aren't the only thing you get from Red Bull.

MLS announced on Friday that it was suspending New York Red Bull players Jeff Parke (defender) and Jon Conway (goalkeeper) for 10 matches for failing drug tests for banned performance-enhancing androstenedione and boldenone metabolites.

According to espnnet's account, MLS officials acknowledged that the players injested over-the-counter supplements, unaware that they contained the banned substances.

"We have met with both players and they informed us that they ingested an over-the-counter supplement that unknowingly contained a banned substance," Erik Stover, club director, said on the team's website.

If the unknowingly injested the substances, isn't 10 matches a bit too harsh a punishment? Ten matches is the longest suspension in league history, and they didn't even break anyone's leg. Also, are they even given a list by the team doctor of supplements to avoid? Do MLS clubs even have team physicians?

MLS Saturday & Sunday (Week 29)

Saturday
New England 0-1 Kansas City (CAB)
Jimmy Conrad scored his sixth of the year for the Wizards. Flashback to preseason...Conrad tells Extratime tools that if he scores 10, KC wins the MLS Cup. Four more to go, Jimmy. With three playoff spots left, KC kept pace with RSL and New York with the win.

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Toronto 2-2 FC Dallas (PSP)
TFC's Marco Velez and Marvell Wynne scored in between a Kenny Cooper sandwich. But considering the top piece of bread was a PK given in injury time, Toronto FC fans were left with a bad taste in their mouths. The PK was awarded after rookie Julius James tugged Adrian Serioux down by the shirt. No video evidence was offered on mlsnet.

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Chivas USA 1-0 San Jose (BSS)
Justin Braun scored in the seventh minute and than the Goats Americano shut it down with good defense for 83 minutes. The win clinched a post-season berth for Chivas USA, who have won four in a row.

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Sunday
Columbus 2-2 Chicago (Toyota Park)
This just in: Brian McBride plays for the Chicago Fire. I know this because he finally reared his head (pun intended) in their match with his ol' team Columbus. Providing the first and last goal of the game in a 2-2 draw. Eddie Gaven and Guillermo Barros Schelotto scored second-half goals for the Crew. But more importantly, the Crew secured the Supporters Shield and are thus, this year's MLS league champions.

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DC United 0-0 Houston (Robertson Stadium)
A nil-nil draw moves DC closer to the offseason and further away from the playoffs. Hope that Open Cup trophy is big enough for Tom Soehn's tears. DC also loses defender Bryan Namoff for the next match, as he was shown a second caution in the 73rd minute.

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Colorado 2-3 Los Angeles (HDC)
David Beckham is away. Landon Donovan plays just 27 minutes. And the Galaxy ... win. Go figure. Edson Buddle, a Ugo Ihemelu own goal and Brandon McDonald's first of the year gave L.A. the 3-2 victory. Former U.S. national team defender Cory Gibbs and a Tom McManus PK gave Colorado its two.

MLS Thursday: Her name is Rio (Week 29)

Real Salt Lake pulled the tarp off Rio Tinto* Stadium on Thursday, but could only manage a draw against the visiting New York Red Bulls. NY's Dave van den Bergh scored off a rebound in the 31st minute, and RSL's Jamison Olave equalized 10 minutes later. Even an 83rd minute ejection of Juan Pietravallo couldn't deliver the winner for RSL in their new stadium's debut.



*Rio Tinto is a London, England-based corporation specializing in mining and exploration.

MLS Saturday & Sunday (Week 28)

Saturday
Chivas USA 3-0 DC United (RFK Stadium)
A tale of two teams headed in opposite directions, as Chivas put three past United at RFK. Ex-United striker Alecko Eskandarian scored in the first half (after a horrendous gaffe by United keeper Louis Crayton) and added an assist in the second. Sasha Victorine and new-Goat Dejair provided the second and third goals.

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Los Angeles 0-1 Columbus (Crew Stadium)
Alejandro Moreno's 43rd-minute goal was all the Crew needed to fend off the LA Beckhams who have won just once in their last 15 matches. Ouch. Can that be right? Yes it can. Highlights
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Salt Lake 2-2 New England (Gillette Stadium)
Javier Morales scored a beauty in the 13th minute and then set-up Andy Williams in the 73rd minute. With the 2-0 lead it looked like RSL would coast. Well, it looked like that for about four minutes, as Steve Ralston scored in the 77th and Taylor Twellman added the equalizer just two minutes later. BTW, Williams received his walking papers in extra time.

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Toronto 3-1 New York (Giants Stadium)
TFC broke an eight-game winless streak in style, thanks two goals by Chad Barrett. Sandwiched in between was a goal by Dane Richards, and then, TFC's added a icing goal in the 86th minute. Check out the extra gear on defender Marvell Wynne:

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Houston 3-1 Colorado (DSG Park)
After three goals in nine minutes, Hawaii 5-0 Brian Ching's two goals had Houston up 2-1. Conor Casey's goal would prove to be a conciliation goal, as Ricardo Clark iced it in the 19th minute. No goals in the second half, despite the 53rd minute double-caution ejection of Casey.

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Sunday
Chicago 1-1 Kansas City (CAB)
Cuauhtemoc Blanco and Michael Harrington traded goals on either side of halftime and the Wiz and Fire split the points.

MLS Saturday & Sunday (Week 27)

Saturday
Houston 1-1 Toronto FC (BMO Field)
How can you score two goals and still draw? A rare goal from defender Marvell Wynne saved a point at home against Houston, as Hunter Freeman knocked an own goal for the visitors.

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Columbus 1-0 New England (Gillette Stadium)
The power in the East may have shifted a bit to the west, as Columbus continues their good form, picking up a road win thanks to Chad Marshall's fourth of the season.

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Colorado 5-4 New York (Giants Stadium)
An old-fashioned NISL-like shootout, with seven goals in the first half. Omar Cummings goal in the third minute was quickly answered by New York's Mike Magee. Conor Casey put the Rapids back on top, only to see a Juan Pablo Angel PK and a Dane Richards strike put New York up 3-2. Then, defender Mike Petke equalized in the 43rd and Casey converted a PK of Colorado's own. New York's Matthew Mbuta equalized again for the home side before Casey completed his hattrick with the winner in the 90th minute. Whew.

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Salt Lake 3-2 San Jose (BS Stadium)
Yura Movsisyan sandwhiched two of his own between a Darren Huckerby brace, leaving the two sides deadlocked till the 59th minute, when RSL's Javier Morales emerged as the hero.

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Kansas City 1-2 Chivas USA (HDC)
Alecko Eskandarian and Sasha Victorine supplied the two goals for Chivas USa, who made the lead hold up despite a 70th minute bicycle kick from Josh Wolff.

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Sunday
DC United 0-3 Dallas FC (PHP)
The three-headed monster of Andre Rocha, Jeff Cunningham and Kenny Cooper kept DC United in the dumps. United are winless since taking the Open Cup title.

MLS Thursday: Crew Dudes (Week 26)

Sept. 12
New York 1-3 Columbus (Crew Stadium)
It was the unlikely hero Frankie "Heydude" Hejduk who led a come-from-behind charge, after Columbus surrendered a beautiful first-half free-kick to the Red Bulls Juan Pablo Angel. After Heydude's equally magnificent equalizer 20 minutes later, Robbie Rogers put the Crew ahead in the second-half with another nice striker from distance and Hejduk set-up Eddie Gaven for the Crew's third of the night. Also in this match, Kevin Goldthwaite losthw his mindthw and gothw himsthwelf thwown outhw.

Heydude's goal


Fines on thway for Goldthwaite

MLS Saturday (Week 25)

Columbus 1-1 Toronto FC (BMO Field)
Pat Noonan's first goal since returning to MLS from Europe helped the Crew secure a point in Toronto. Carl Robinson's sixth minute goal put the Reds on top until Noonan's equalizer in the 40th minute. Both goals were rather impressive, but since the Crew's goal was broadcast on a tiny screen so the local station could broadcast a weather report, I'll show you Robinson's one-timer.

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Los Angeles 0-2 Kansas City (Arrowhead Stadium)
Goals by Josh Wolff and Davy Arnaud, just two minutes part (67th and 69th minutes), couldn't make up for the terrible NFL-lined pitch that this game was played on. I couldn't tell if it was a hand ball or a Hail Mary. Yuck. And double yuck for Los Angeles. All those changes and they look like the same ol' terrible Galaxy. The best thing about this game was the box score which features this gem: KC -- Josh Wolff (caution; Shirt Removal) 67.

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FC Dallas 2-2 DC United (RFK Stadium)
Andre Rocha score his second goal of the season and saved a draw for FC Dallas against United, who had jumped out to a 2-1 lead on goals by Jaime Moreno and Santino Quaranta. The assist on Moreno's goal went to new addition, Thabiso Khumalo. Kenny Cooper scored the opening goal of the match in the ninth minute and demonstrated why Bob Bradley must call him up.

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Salt Lake 1-2 New York (Giants Stadium)
Juan Pablo Angel and Dave van den Bergh each scored a goal in the second-half to bring the Red Bulls back from a 1-0 deficit in the first half, courtesy of Yura Movsisyan.

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Houston 1-1 San Jose (BSS)
The point-split theme continued in the nightcap with Houston saving a draw at San Jose. Ronnie O'Brien put the home team up 1-0 in the 50th, and then Brian Ching, fresh from his national team duty, provided the equalizer in the 71st minute. But an 85th-minute ejection of Eddie Robinson for a second caution made things interesting.

MLS Saturday (Week 24)

Chivas USA 3-1 Toronto FC (BMO Field)
Ante Razov set up two goals and scored the third, as Chivas USA surged past Toronto in a match that saw a bizarre double ejection of Alecko Eskandarian (TFC) and Mario Velez (CHV) in first-half injury time. Velez and Eskandarian collided midair collision and ref Kevin Stott gave both straight reds. The loss of Velez, however, clearly hurt Toronto more than Esky's absence for Chivas.
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New England 0-4 Columbus (Crew Stadium)
Since winning the SuperLiga, the Revs can't seem to get back on track. Meanwhile, the Crew are looking like the team to beat, as Guillermo Barros Schelotto's two assists and a goal put down the Revolution. Second-half sub Jason Garey picked up a brace and Andy Iro rounded out the lopsided contest.
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New York 0-1 Chicago (Toyota Park)
Stephen King was "It," as his 36th minute goal decided the match in favor of the home team, handing New York their first loss since July 10 and putting Chicago in second place overall.

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DC United 1-2 San Jose (BS Stadium)
Arturo Alvarez continues to make FC Dallas look stupid for trading him (and Bob Bradley for not calling him up), as he scores his sixth of the year for San Jose. Darren Huckerby added another in the second half. DC's Santino Quaranta cut the deficit in the 76th minute, but United could not find the equalizer.

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Real Salt Lake 2-2 Los Angeles (HDC)
With Becks on international duty, bookend goals by Bryan Jordan and Edson Buddle gave the Galaxy a point at home against RSL. Salt Lake's Yura Movsisyan and Will Johnson scored on either side of halftime.